Emotional Psychological Abuse ~ The Craziness of Coercive Control

by Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.

Have you ever noticed how some people will lose their mind in their pursuit to get you to do as they desire? The things that they do and the things they say border on absolute insanity, from the outside looking in. But, from their perspective, they are merely twisting your arm to secure your compliance.

For example, take a look at Harold and Melinda. Harold has an important trip planned in which he will take the microphone to share his perspective in a panel discussion clear across the country. He wants his girlfriend Melinda to accompany him, and seeks to convince her that his performance (as well as his success) hinges on her presence.

However, Melinda struggles with a complicated leg injury that interferes with her ability to walk comfortably. She knows that she requires medical attention, yet all of her energy is tied up in fighting off Harold’s demands.

Coercive Control Tactics

Five days before Harold’s planned trip, Melinda announces that if she feels by the end of the week as she feels now, she is concerned about traveling. She didn’t even say she wasn’t going, yet Harold is all over her with coercive control tactics designed to make her head spin.