Domestic Violence Abuse ~ What Is Domestic Violence?

by Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.

Claire is an upper middle class suburban semi-retiree, enjoying a second career of loving and promoting art. She thought that domestic abuse was about hitting until the day she awaken unto the fact that her marital pain was due to psychological and emotional abuse.

She had no idea that the day in and day out mental manipulations and twisting of her heart strings was all about psychological control. The emotional dependency cultivated in her relationship blindsided her to the personal oppression and financial abuse ahead.

Claire never thought of herself as a victim of spousal abuse. For crying out loud, she was an educated woman of means who had never been hit by a man or even called a…(you know what). And then, a friend rooted in the domestic violence literature informed her otherwise. It was indeed a wake-up call to learn that her inner crippling was clearly domestic abuse.

Hitting As the Icing on the Cake

Most people (as did Claire) believe that the “black and blue” defines domestic violence. There is certainly some truth to this belief in law enforcement.

For example, when the police show up at your door, the first thing they look for is “actual” evidence. That is a sign of one party injured by…